Man oh Manschewitz! It’s been a while since I’ve written a journal entry… So, instead of making an excuse, i’ll just update you on everything that’s going on… At this point, all is doing ok, I’m hanging in
there. I should have been done with radiation by now, but we ran into some complications. Hopefully I’ll be done sometime this week.
Let’s pick up the story on November 1, the day of my “block check” and first radiation
treatment. After having been through the simulation the Thursday before, I really wasn’t looking forward to being strapped onto the table for the block check for a long time. To make long and agonizing story short, I freaked
during the block check. They got me onto the table and into my mask. Then, the person doing the check had some problems aligning my body with the tattoos. They had to call in the other tech to help. So, it was about
15-20 minutes later that I was finally situated properly to do the block check (the whole thing was supposed to take only 30-45 minutes). Yadda yadda yadda… after about 40 minutes of lying still and being drawn on, I’m really
uncomfortable with my arms above my head and I can’t move… She goes to take an xray of me, and puts the film about an inch above my nose… She goes to check the film with the doctor. By the time she came back I was
nearly screaming for her to let me up, and I was in tears by the time I got out of the mask… Something about being alone in the room, even for a few seconds, strapped down with a plate an inch above my nose triggered a major panic
attack! Can you blame me? I was totally freaked out… When I calmed down, I still had to be strapped down again and finish up… Needless to say, when I came back 2 hours later for my first radiation treatment, I
was still shakey and almost asked for a sedative… Not a fun thing!
Anyway, I’m passed that now… I’ve completed 18 of the 20 treatments… The process is rather mundane, actually… Every day at the same time, I
show up, head right for the dressing room where I put on a gown, they strap me down, nuke me, and I go home. Takes about 10 minutes, actual time in the microwave is only about two minutes… The first week wasn’t too
bad… Started getting red a little bit right away… Then a bit of nausea. Finally, definitely noticed fatigue becoming a problem. But I coped. Second week more of the same… My skin got a little
redder… About the beginning of the second week, my hair fell out. Actually, only the hair in the field of radiation fell out… So, a lot of chest har, lost my goattee, and a weird square on the back left side of my
head… Oh what fun… For the second time this year, I lost my hair and it didn’t happen in the shower or at night like in the movies… Nope, sitting at my desk running my hands through my hair and watching it stick to
my hand. Another fun side effect hit at the end of the second week… I lost all sense of taste. I mean ALL sense of taste… Hotwings tasted like cardboard… I knew they were hot because I was sweating, but
couldn’t taste a damn thing… Luckily that passed after a while, but for two days it was really bad (talk about no desire to eat when everything tastes like paper).
And, for our final topic we’ll talk about burns. I now
have second degree burns on both sides of my neck. It is a lot of fun… After the third week, I went to the doctor because my skin was turning quite red. He suggested taking the week off from radiation. So, I did,
but that Sunday my skin finally broke down and peeled. Not quite like a sunburn, but close… the skin was really red underneath… Things turned worse from here. I had two more treatments before the situation got
really uncomfortable… They gave me some special creme to dress the burns (having said that I was “way past” the stuff they orignally gave me). I’ve been wearing a bandage around my neck to prevent it rubbing against my
clothing… It’s REALLY uncomfortable and painful. I’m not happy. Plus, the fatigue has kicked in big time…Total exhaustion…
So, here I am… Two more treatments to go… Some of the burns are
healing well, and new skin is forming…. Others are getting a bit worse, still early in the healing process… I’ll go to the doctor tomorrow and see what they say… Maybe I’ll finish this week, or maybe I’ll have to
wait more… Who knows?
But, be assured I’m hanging in there… The end is in sight… Almost there… I can almost touch it… And I’ll get there when the time is right. Don’t want to cause myself any
further discomfort and pain…
Remission is right around the corner…
